Our relationship with God is meant to be strong and beautiful. However, just like any other relationship, it can become toxic if we're not mindful and careful. Recognizing these signs is the first step towards healing and repairing our connection with the Lord. Remember, every relationship takes consistent effort and intentionality. Just because a relationship is healthy one day does not mean it will always be healthy unless there is consistent work and mindfulness to preserve the health of the relationship. Without further ado, these are 15 signs that reveal we might have a toxic relationship with God:
1. We Are Selfish (It's All About Us)
If our prayers and conversations with God revolve only around our needs and desires, without considering His will or others, it’s a sign of toxicity in the relationship. Healthy relationships require care and consideration on both ends.
2. We Are Prideful
If we approach our relationship with God with arrogance and entitlement, it will be impossible to grow in our relationship. The key to God's heart is humility.
3. We Harbor Unforgiveness
Holding grudges and refusing to forgive not only damages our earthly relationships but will also affect our spiritual relationship with God because God sees our forgiveness towards others as appreciation and acknowledgment of His forgiveness towards us.
4. We Don't Seek His Will
When we make a habit of not seeking God's guidance in our decision-making and rely on our own wisdom alone, it can strain our relationship with God. We end up prioritizing our own understanding over trusting in Him, which will gradually lead us down a path that doesn’t align with His plan for us.
5. We Don't Claim Him in Public
If we're hesitant to acknowledge God or our faith in public, it's a sign that our relationship with God is suffering. God wants us to be proud of Him, and He enjoys when we are not ashamed to love Him out loud.
6. We Give God the Silent Treatment (Lack of Communication)
If we avoid communication with God when we’re upset or not satisfied, it shows that we only like Him when things are going our way. God desires unconditional love from us.
7. We Gold Dig (Greed and Materialism)
If we find ourselves constantly chasing after material possessions and putting them above our relationship with God, it can actually get in the way of our walk with Him and create some problems in our connection with God. He doesn’t want us to love Him or use Him for what He can provide. He wants us to love Him for who He is.
8. We Cheat (Idolatry)
When we choose other things over our relationship with God, it’s considered idolatry. God equates it to cheating on Him because He wants to be the one that we trust and love and share intimacy and vulnerability with. When we give our heart and devotion to other things or people and not God, He becomes jealous for us and our time.
9. We Keep Secrets From God
Secrets and hidden sins can damage our connection with God. Transparency is key to a healthy relationship. Although God sees our hearts, He wants us to acknowledge and in include Him in good times and bad times because He wants to be involved in every aspect of our lives. Shutting Him out of different parts of our life is hurtful and damaging to the strength of our relationship with Him.
10. We Lack Trust (Doubt and Unbelief)
Lack of trust in God's plan and promises can erode our faith and make our relationship feel toxic. God truly desires us to believe in Him and trust Him in our relationship. Relationships cannot thrive without trust.
11. We Disobey
If we keep disobeying God, it might mean our connection with Him isn't as strong as we think. It's a sign to take a closer look at our relationship and make it more authentic. Obedience is a way to prove that we trust and support God and His plan for us.
12. We Forget About Him When Things are Good
If we only turn to God when we're in trouble and neglect Him during good times, our relationship may be suffering. If we forget about Him once things start looking better, it hurts God’s feelings.
13. We Don't Show Gratitude or Appreciation
Expressing gratitude and appreciation is vital for a healthy relationship with God because there are many things that God is faithful in doing for us that we often are not aware of, overlook, or fail to acknowledge.
14. We Are Hypocritical
If we present ourselves as dedicated believers in public but behave differently in private, it's hurtful to our relationship with God because He knows our true intentions. Knowing better but not doing better looks like we don’t genuinely care about His feelings or expectations.
15. We Don't Repent (We Make Excuses and Avoid Taking Accountability)
Taking responsibility for our mistakes and seeking forgiveness is essential for having a healthy relationship with God. This can also be a form of gaslighting. Although gaslighting will not work against God, the attempt still hurts our relationship with Him.